This article describes 5 helpful tips for couples to save money and improve their relationship. “Nearly all marriages come with financial challenges. Big or small, money issues are going to come up and it can be stressful. Whenever we are feeling strapped, my husband and I tend to, well, overreact, and try to completely overhaul our finances. We’ve been known to try to save thousands of dollars in a week or spend zero money for an entire month. It’s the financial equivalent of a crash diet and therefore it never works.”
The author describes making “small, manageable changes that could make a dent in our finances without sending us into a splurge cycle. After a month of putting these five tactics to work, we have found that not only did they have a positive effect on our bank account, they had a positive effect on our marriage, too.”
- Groceries. Their financial planner said: “because a grocery bill is not a fixed expense—like a car payment or internet—it can be drastically reduced. He suggested creating a meal plan before going to the store and buying only for those specific meals.” He also likes to buy groceries online so that he knows ahead of time how much the bill will be. The resulting weekly grocery bill came down significantly.
- Transportation. According to the financial planner, “’Aside from walking, public transportation is the next best alternative. Buses and light rails are a perfect way for getting around in any urban area’, and while I shouldn’t have to have that fact pointed out to me, it took someone else saying it to make us actually go, Oh, right, we can use public transportation. We took his advice and—in addition to using our two legs—we hopped on the city bus four times in a month and took one romantic streetcar ride.” This saved money on gas, Uber and Lyft services.
- Staying in on weekends. “Once Friday rolls around, I feel that I’ve earned a night out for the hard work I’ve done all week. But lately, we’ve created a bad habit of going out Friday night, then again on Saturday—and often Sunday for brunch. Our weekend fun was getting ridiculously expensive, so we vowed to stay in one night per weekend.”
- Travel thriftily. The couple realized they “treat every trip like a special vacation: spendy dinners, once-in-a-lifetime activities, and fancy hotels.” Their financial planner “suggested booking a rental home, instead of a hotel, to save a lot of money.”
- Use cash. The biggest tip from the financial planner “is to use cash. ‘I know what you are thinking: Who uses cash anymore?’ he said to me. ‘Hear me out: When you set aside cash for social activities, it becomes harder to overspend. Once the money is gone, that’s it—it’s gone. Plan your nightlife around your budget, and not your budget around your nightlife.'” The couple was able to save money and enjoy new experiences.
How Elaine Korngold Can Help
Couples rank money as the top problem prior to marriage, and in the early stages of marriage. Money is one of the main reasons that couples argue or divorce. This is where I can help. My professional background and my training give me a unique perspective on how money impacts people. Frequently, it is not the lack of money that creates stress and anxiety, but how people mismanage their finances. I can help you clarify your values around money, identify the messages you received from your family, and understand what drives your money behaviors. For couples, I integrate Financial Therapy with Gottman Method Couples Therapy and Intimacy From the Inside Out Therapy to help couples communicate more constructively, save money, and develop tactical skills to foster a healthy financial partnership.